Turning Setbacks into Strength: My Personal Story

I found out quickly, the last couple of months I would have some major changes in my life. I would switch departments at work. I would have this department that looks to be successful from the outside. Still, looking closer would reveal that it was self-run. It was not led by the other leaders.

I would find many friends whom I normally would train, but can’t practice with me. I would find some health issues that are still unknown, but appointments are set up, but not too soon.

The last year has brought me lots of challenges. My husband lost his job last summer. I have to admit I got used to being spoiled at home. He has been on the hunt for a new job.

So to train on my own shouldn’t be a problem, should it? I should have all the time in the world, but being solo isn’t fun. Am I only if others do it? I ran a 50K last year, and the two folks I ran it with ended up dropping out. So what is giving me this quieter attitude? Maybe it is a huge climb, and I need to consider my downtime.

Up until last week, I think I have done decently in my training. Yet, I still have 7 weeks left. Most others are getting it done in 2 weeks after the local marathon is over.

My husband got a job and starts tomorrow after 15 months. It will be uncharted waters for us with schedules. Yet, it has been a blessing for him to land a job!

I am scared of my health. I also know if it’s extreme, then I am going to be off work for a couple of months. I would probably do anything for a run at that time.

Is that enough to give me a drive? Do I need motivation, confirmation, or a reminder of how much I have to be grateful for? The whirlwind of thoughts, and they do not stop.

Do you ever get this way? Overwhelmed by all the thoughts and voices in your head?

I remind myself of what I have accomplished. I remember two weeks ago thinking the exact same thing. Somehow, things work out. I will continue with the positivity and let it help push me.

Halfway to November and Fully Losing It

I’m not sure what I’ve gotten myself into. I’m halfway through training for a race that happens the first weekend of November, and the miles are getting longer, my legs are getting heavier, and my brain? Somewhere between “foggy” and “full system reboot.”

I’m tired. Like, “Should I take a sick day just to nap between runs?” tired. I never call in. I’m questioning everything:

  • Am I strong enough for this?
  • Why is work getting in the way of my dreams (and my tempo runs)?
  • Is it normal to feel like you’re unraveling while also crushing 3 a.m. miles?

Most of my running friends aren’t training long this year, or their schedules don’t align with my “pre-sunrise shuffle.” So I’m out here solo, doubting myself, and wondering if I’m just being dramatic or if this is what peak training madness feels like. Most don’t start work at 5am, and the reasoning for my early runs.

The worst part? I know the hardest part is still ahead. But deep down, I also know I can do this. I just need to stop yelling at my Garmin and maybe drink more water.

Trail Run or Travel Mug? Because I Got Poured On Either Way

Well, this weekend’s training didn’t exactly go as planned. I was signed up for a 25K trail run—because nothing says “relaxing weekend” like voluntarily running over a slippery reservoir with grace.

This course is known for its “fun” water crossings. Last year, they had water crossing guards—basically lifeguards for runners who forgot that trail shoes don’t come with flotation devices. I was mentally prepared for that. What I was not prepared for? The weather.

I made the rare decision to ride with someone else. Normally, I like to be in control of my own escape route. If things get too cozy or someone suggests post-run brunch, I want to vanish . But this time, I committed.

We drove 75 minutes through a light sprinkle. Spirits were high. We signed in, hit the porta-potty (which had clearly seen some things), and then… the skies opened up. Not a drizzle. A full-on biblical downpour.

They delayed the race 45 minutes. Then another hour. Then another 30 minutes. At this point, I was starting to feel like I was in a hostage situation with my hydration pack.

My ride was getting antsy, and I was starting to worry about the slippery spillway and rocky terrain. So I made the call: we bailed. I know. I KNOW. I’ve been pouty ever since. I hit the treadmill for 11 miles when I got home, but it wasn’t the same. I kept thinking, “If I’d driven myself, I would’ve stuck it out.”

They ended up starting the race at 10 a.m. I ended up sulking in my kitchen, eating peanut butter out of the jar like a trail-running raccoon.

Get over it, you big brat. (Talking to myself. Kind of.)

New Department, No Memory, and a 50-Mile Midlife Crisis

Three weeks ago, I switched departments at work. I was in my last one for three years, which in corporate time is basically a lifetime. Now? I’m in a new role, with a new team, and a brain that apparently didn’t make the transfer.

The previous supervisor trained me for two weeks, then vanished on vacation like a magician. So now I’m fumbling through tasks like I’m trying to defuse a bomb with oven mitts. My memory? Let’s just say it’s not what it used to be. Or maybe it is and I just forgot.

To add spice to the chaos, I signed up for a 50-mile race. Yes, FIFTY. As in five-zero. I’ve never done one before, but I’m getting my miles in before and after work like a determined (and slightly delirious) squirrel. Exhaustion? Oh, she’s here. She’s thriving.

My friend said she could tell I was stressed when we ran the other night in heat that felt like the surface of the sun. I smiled and nodded, pretending I wasn’t melting from the inside out.

Also, I haven’t worked a Saturday in two weeks. Normally I work 75% of them, so this feels like cheating on my job with my running shoes. I’m torn between guilt and glee. Guilt because I’m not working. Glee because I’m finally getting my long runs in without having to sprint back to a meeting.

And no, I can’t run during lunch. I work in one giant warehouse with no escape routes. I envy those magical unicorns who can sneak out for a run between meetings. I run between mental breakdowns and badge scans.

🧠 Locked Out, Logged Off, and Running on Guilt (and Coffee)

So, I’ve been locked out of my Microsoft account for two full days. TWO. DAYS. That’s 48 hours of pretending I’m still a functioning adult while secretly spiraling because I can’t access my calendar, my files, or my sense of identity.

To make it worse, I tried to log into my WordPress account from my work computer (because work is slow and I had bloggy things to say), but apparently, security said no. Like, full-on digital bouncer at the club: “You’re not on the list.”

So now I’m sitting here, sipping lukewarm coffee, feeling like a total fraud. I told my friend I only needed to run 10 miles—because that’s her sweet spot—but really, I needed 11 to 14. So I sneakily ran a few miles from home before we met up, just thrilled she’d do the bulk of it with me. I’m not proud. Okay, I’m a little proud.

Meanwhile, work has thrown me into a new department, and my brain is doing cartwheels trying to keep up. I’m clinging to my running schedule like it’s a life raft in a sea of onboarding documents and new acronyms.

And here’s the kicker: I haven’t worked a Saturday in two weeks. TWO. WEEKS. I usually work 75% of Saturdays, so this feels like cheating on my job with my running shoes. I’m torn between guilt and giddy excitement because—hello—training runs.

There’s just so much going on in my head right now. I’m locked out of my accounts, locked into a new department, and running from my responsibilities (literally). But hey, at least I’m getting the miles in.

Why I run at 3 AM ( and Sometimes in My Dreams)

Welcome to “Run Between Meetings”—where the only thing faster than my pace is my calendar filling up.

Let’s be honest: I don’t run because I love it. I run because it’s the only time I’m not answering emails, dodging deadlines, or trying to remember if I already drank that coffee or just imagined it.

The Chaos Cardio Combo

My typical day:

  • Wake up at 3:00 AM
  • Run like I’m being chased by my to-do list
  • Shower, coffee, Zoom, repeat

Sometimes I even wear my running shoes to work. Not because I’m going for a run—just because I forgot to change.

Why I Keep Running

  • It’s cheaper than therapy
  • It’s the only time I’m not multitasking (unless you count dodging squirrels)
  • It reminds me I’m alive, even if my legs disagree

So if you’re a part-time runner with a full-time schedule and a sense of humor, you’re in the right place.

Let’s lace up and laugh through the madness.